A Wounded Heart
by Of Memories Past
Summary: A misunderstanding leads to hateful words and hurt feelings. Kagome goes back to her time with wounds inflicted by words that can cut deeper than a knife. Can Inuyasha fix what he has done? ONE SHOT


Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha.

A Wounded Heart

By: Of Memories Past

~`^`~

     Kagome never understood how words could cut one right to the soul until he said it. And she felt as if she had received her mortal wound. But even the cruel words would not have affected her if he had not said it the way that he did. His entire body screamed that he meant it. His body screamed out cruel anger. The way he stood so rigidly with his hands clenched into tight fists as he looked at her with a cold, malicious gleam in his eyes and subconsciously bared his glistening fangs at her would not leave her mind. She closed her eyes as the tears stubbornly came to slip beneath her eyelashes and course down her cheeks. Words were cruel.

     A strangled cry slipped out from her and her hand flew to her mouth in a futile effort to keep her tears and cries at bay. But she knew that it would be a useless effort to try and stop. Her heart felt as if it had literally been broken in two. Tear-filled chocolate orbs lifted sorrowfully to meet the hard, amber gaze focused on her. For a few moments, she held his harsh gaze and allowed the gentle sound of wind rustling the leaves of the forest's trees to fill her senses. Normally, such a calming resonance would have soothed her. But not now. No, five words—_five _little words—destroyed her defenses and shattered her heart.

     "You…" she looked down and worried her bottom lip before allowing her eyes to slide back up to his and receive another painful glare. "You don't mean that." Her voice only came out in a whisper.

     "I meant every damn word, wench," Inuyasha hissed. His eyes narrowed threateningly as he stepped forward and tightly grasped her arms, ignoring her cry of pain. He could feel her shiver in fear as he leaned in and rested his cheek pitilessly against hers. "I hate your very soul."

     The steady scent of salt invaded his senses as the tears that clung to her lashes imprisoned themselves no more and turned into a steady stream. He heard the soft, heartfelt cries that came from her throat as she shed her tears, but he was coldhearted to them. She could cry all that she wanted. He would not let himself care.

     Kagome rubbed her bruised arms when he let go, hugging herself as she pulled away from him. She looked mournfully at the forest floor, the small whimpers continuing to come as she tried to gain control of herself. Her eyes clamped shut in pain. Those words hurt _so_ much. A tearful gaze lifted back up to him, and she flinched. His eyes were hard and emotionless. Dropping her hands to her sides, Kagome clenched her fists and stepped forward.

     "You jerk…" Another stifled cry came as she lifted her hand and slapped him.

     Inuyasha's head snapped to the side, his cheek throbbing slightly at the burning impact. A hand filled with sorrow always hurt more than an angry one. When he turned his narrowed eyes back to the human girl in front of him, he was surprised to see her tears well up once more and her arms reach out and wrap themselves around his neck.

     _She still doesn't change,_ he thought, closing his eyes as she clung to him. She still looked to him even when he was the cause of her pain. Inuyasha did not return the embrace, but neither did he push her back. Instead, he allowed her to cry, her sobs racking her small body relentlessly as she wept into the wild mane of silver hair that she loved so much. His eyes snapped open when she reached up to rub his ears. But the gentle caress ended as soon as it had started, and he felt Kagome pull back.

     Wiping at her eyes, Kagome looked up at Inuyasha and drew every ounce of strength that she had left in her. "I loved you," she whispered, her voice cracking. Her lip quivered. "I still love you. More than you will ever know." She knelt down and reached for her forsaken yellow backpack, knowing that her breakdown was coming and coming fast. But she refused to be overcome in front of him. "Goodbye, Inuyasha." Before he could protest, she stood up on her tiptoes and pressed a quick, chaste kiss to his cheek. 

     Then she was gone.

     Inuyasha growled as a feral look came over his features. "Good riddance, wench!" His claws dug deeply into his hands when he clenched his fists and tears of his own sprung into his eyes. But he quickly pushed them back, forcing himself to believe that it was her fault. After all, she was the one who wanted to go back; she was the one who wanted to be rid of him. His heart had been stolen once and crushed in return. Now, after learning to love again, he would not stand for his heart to be broken once more by someone who said that they wanted to leave him. He swallowed his tears. His heart would not survive something like that again.

     Home. She wanted to go home. After years of searching and fighting, their task was finally complete, and the very first thing she could think of was going home. He remembered with spite how she had joyously leapt into the air, shouting that she could return to her family. To him it translated into her joy of leaving them—leaving_ him_. 

     Love was nothing more than a fool's game.

~`^`~

     _It hurts_. Pain filled her being as she sank down into the soft, pink sheets of her bed. Her tears immediately came in racking sobs as Kagome cried for everything that had happened. She cried for her pain, she cried for her broken heart, but most importantly she cried for him. Those words hurt more than she had ever imagined words ever would. Those little elements compounded of letters, symbols, and sounds had the power of a razor-sharp knife that had plunged itself deep within her and then mercilessly ripped up through her body. She secretly thought that a knife would have been less painful when her swollen eyes closed, seeking sleep. Sleep. It was her only escape from the pains of life, and she could only pray that her dreams did not carry them with.

     She felt a moist breeze flow through her window and over her, and she shivered. Common sense told her that she should get up and close it, but Kagome did not think that that window would ever be closed again. 

     Fisting her hands into her pillow, Kagome turned over onto her side and allowed more tears to flow. He _hated_ her. She whimpered sadly at the thought. He hated her _soul_. She had seen it in his eyes. Tears came harshly as she realized that that meant that the hatred he felt was for whom she was through and through. He hated what made her _her. _ 

     But she loved him.

     She loved him for who _he_ was—not for what he might or could be, and it hurt more than a knife itself when you loved one that hated you.

     Burying her face into her pillow, Kagome willed the tears to stop. She still did not know the cause for his outrage and hateful words. But in a strange way, it made sense. Naraku was gone. They had the jewel—or he had it. She had given it to him when the last shards were in place, hoping deep within her that it would make him happy—hoping that his old wish was no longer a desire. He did not need her anymore. He did not need to pretend to be nice to her any longer. He had what he wanted.

     "Has he always hated me?" she whispered in her pillow.

~`^`~

     Inuyasha watched as Kagome suffered alone in her room from the Goshinboku. He had fought the voice in the back of his head telling him to leave her alone and just go on with his life, as he was better off without her anyway. But Inuyasha couldn't. His cruel tongue had injured her more than once before, but this was the first time that he was afraid that he really might have broken her. 

     Another wretched sob brought his attention from his thoughts back to the crying girl. His own heart, much to his chagrin, tore in two at the sound of her sobs, and he knew only too well that he was the cause of it. He had done this to her through heartless, anger-filled words that were his cruel way of relieving the emotions that he kept bottled up inside of him.

     "Has he always hated me?" she whispered in her pillow.

     His eyes snapped up at the words her choked voice murmured, and he felt his last resolve to leave her alone fail as he silently leaped from the branches and into her open window. A frown formed on his lips when he drew closer to her bed. She looked even worse now that he stood only inches from her. Tentatively, he sat down next to her. "I don't hate you."

     Kagome slowly lifted her head when she felt his weight settle onto her bed. Her tearstained face turned to look back at his. He looked as miserable as she. Normally straight and proud shoulders were hunched, and he kept his gaze on the floor. The breeze coming through her window hastily blew his silvery white hair into his face and hid his eyes from her view. Uncertainly, she reached out to brush the hair from his face so that she could see his eyes. His face was as tearstained as hers and his eyes desolate. She lightly brushed her fingers over the dark circles forming from being both physically and emotionally exhausted.

     "I'm sorry," he whispered, not daring to meet her scrutinizing gaze.

     "Sorry?" Kagome's eyes flashed and she pulled back her hand as she hastily scrambled out of bed, trying to put distance between them. "You're sorry?"

     Inuyasha looked up at her his own eyes smoldering. "I know that _sorry_ isn't good enough, Kagome. But I don't know what else to say." He scowled and turned his face away. "I'm trying, bitch!"

     Kagome laughed disdainfully. "You say you're trying, and then you call me _bitch_!" she all but shouted. "How about telling me why you suddenly decided that you hated the very fact that I was alive—breathing! Or have you hated me all along?"

     "Kagome," Inuyasha growled. Moving to stand in front of her rigid, angry form, he glowered down at her. "I already told you that I don't hate you! Why aren't you listening?"

     It was Kagome's turn to growl. "I—"

     "Kagome?"

     Kagome froze at the sound of her mother's voice, her blood running cold in her veins. This was the last thing she needed. Hastily dragging Inuyasha by his arm into the bathroom, she flicked on the light and started running the water.

     "Kagome, what are you…?"

     The tired, emotionally drained girl placed a finger against his lips before jerking him upward to sit on the counter. He did so grudgingly, and she thought that he looked like a little kid waiting for his mother to bandage a newly scraped knee as he sat there and absently swung his legs. 

     "Stay here," she whispered and then left.

     Inuyasha grumbled from the counter and listened to Kagome talk with her mother. He did not doubt that she had told Mrs. Higurashi about what had happened, and for some reason the thought disheartened him. He had come to like the woman and knew that if he were the one in her position, she would not have much liked him right now.

     "Kagome, what are you doing awake?" Mrs. Higurashi said softly and looked down at her daughter with concern. She had been rather despondent since she had returned home.

     Kagome shook her head and offered a weak smile. "I just don't feel too well, and I think that a bath would help. I'm fine, Mama, really." Well, it wasn't really a lie. She had felt horrible since she had last talked to Inuyasha and if things did not go well now, she could always toss him into the water.

     The wise woman looked at her daughter skeptically before nodding her head and leaning down to kiss her daughter's cheek. "Feel better, Kagome."

     Smiling weakly until her mother turned around, Kagome dropped the grin when she had left and returned to the bathroom. Inuyasha was knelt over the edge of the tub, turning the knobs on and off when she opened the door.

     "Why are there two?" he asked with his back still turned to her. He continued playing with the knobs, utterly fascinated with how they started and stopped the flow of water.

     Sighing, Kagome went and sat of the edge of the tub next to him. "This one," she said, turning on the left knob, "releases hot water."

     "Like a hot spring?" He looked at her curiously for a moment while she nodded before tentatively moving his hand under the steamy flow of liquid. Unfortunately, the hot water was on full blast, and he mildly scalded himself. Inuyasha flinched and pulled his hand back, glaring at the water. "That's a lot hotter than a hot spring!" he growled. 

     Kagome shook her head and took his hand in hers brushing the burning droplets of water off with her thumb. Things from her time caught his curiosity so much sometimes that he did not think too clearly. She shut off the hot water and then turned the knob on the right.

     "This turns on cold water," she said gently, pushing his hand underneath to soothe the burn. "If you want water that's just warm, you can mix the two by turning both on at the same time." She tried not to concentrate on his hand as she spoke, tears threatening to come to her eyes as she remembered the times before when she had taken care of him while he was hurt. "You can have more hot or more cold, depending on with knob you turn more." Flicking the knobs back and forth, Kagome demonstrated until finally settling on making the bath hot. Maybe she would jump in after he left.

     Inuyasha nodded and gently pulled his hand from her grasp. The burn felt better now that it had been cooled. He dried it off on his haori. "Why do you have the water running now?"

     "So Mama and the others don't hear us. The running water should drown out our voices." Her voice trailed as thoughts of needing a bath to de-stress after this played in her mind.

     Nodding quietly, Inuyasha sat on the floor and leaned against the tub, and Kagome moved to sit in front of him. He watched her as she concentrated on her hands and avoided eye contact with him completely. If she had something to say, it was obvious that she was waiting for him to say something before she opened her mouth, and he frowned inwardly. No matter how big of a jerk he had been, Kagome was giving him a chance to explain and defend himself before she became overly angry.

     Unfortunately, he did not even have a clue as to how to explain his behavior.

     He stretched his legs out beside her instead of sitting in his usual cross-legged position and dropped his hands into his lap. "Kagome, I…"

     "You hurt me," she whispered, her tears evident in her voice. "You hurt me so badly." 

     Inuyasha watched a few droplets of the salty moisture fall silently onto her hands, not knowing what to say as she cried. He frowned, always hating it when she did. And his frown grew deeper, knowing that he was the cause of her tears. 

     "I could handle Kikyou," she whispered, looking up at him as she wiped her eyes. "I could handle all the times that you left and brought yourself to the woman who wanted to kill you and take you from me." She desperately tried to hold back her tears. "And I could handle all the times that you called me _wench_ or _bitch_ even if that miffed me a little. But I can't handle you hating me," she choked, and the tears came freely. "I just can't. Not after we've been though so much together."

     "Kagome, stop," he pleaded, watching as the hot steam from the running water caused her pulled back hair to curl around the edges. The steam had thickened in the room and increased the temperature. Along with her tears, beads of sweat began to form on her delicate face. Inuyasha pushed his haori off his shoulders and tossed it aside as the heat began getting to him. "Please stop, Kagome." She was rubbing gently at her eyes, trying to erase the tears that he had caused. 

    Inuyasha growled, angry with himself for what he had done and turned his head to look at the water pouring into the tub. His amber eyes glared angrily as his thoughts raced through his head. He knew why he had done it, and he also knew that he had not meant it and had been spouting off to cover his own hurt. But in the end it had done nothing more than cause more pain. His ears suddenly twitched as he heard her move and drag herself across the floor to sit next to him. Inuyasha looked down into her tear bright eyes, and his own saddened.

     "Why?" she asked quietly and then bit her bottom lip as she reached up and absently began running her fingers through a silver forelock. 

     Inuyasha closed his eyes. "I thought you wanted to leave me."

     "What?" Startled at his words, Kagome looked up with widened eyes. "Why would you think that if I told you that I would never leave you? I meant what I said, Inuyasha."

     "You didn't act like it," he scowled, turning his face from her view and crossing his arms over his chest. "Not two seconds after we defeat Naraku and get the rest of the shards—not _two seconds—­_you start jumping around and celebrating that you get to go home now." He turned his face back to her, his amber eyes looking intently into hers. "Did you want to leave us—leave _me_—that badly?"

     "I never wanted to leave you!" she whispered harshly, jumping to her feet. Her eyes blazed down at him. "I don't want to leave you now! I was just happy that that crazy quest for shards was finally over. Yes, I was excited about being able to spend more time with my family now and catch up in school, but I would _never _leave you!" Kagome buried her face in her hands, spreading her fingers slightly after a moment to look at him through the gaps, and she mumbled something inaudible.

     "What?" Inuyasha leaned toward her, but not even his sharp hearing could decipher her muffled voice.

     "I said that I love you," Kagome whispered sadly as she removed her hands from her face. With a small sigh, she dropped to the floor beside him. "God knows why, but I do. So why would I leave you?" Tears began trailing down her cheeks again. "And you know that I could never leave the others. They're as much a part of my life now as anything here in this time is." She looked down at the floor for a moment before bringing her gaze back up to his. "Why didn't you tell me this? It could have saved so much grief."

     Inuyasha turned to her, his lips parted to answer, but no sound came. He dropped his golden eyes dejectedly.

     A rueful smile tugged at the corner of Kagome's lips. "It's your pride," she murmured. "It's always getting in the way."

     He hung his head, knowing she was right. For a moment they sat in silence, listening to the steady pounding of water against the porcelain floor of the tub. The steam was so thick now that both of their hair was curling around the edges, perspiration beading on their faces. Inuyasha grimaced when he moved to get more comfortable and noticed that his yukata and hakama clung to his skin. He pulled at the material, trying to separate as much as he could from his body in hopes that things would cool down a bit.

     Kagome reached over and switched on the cool water. She tried to ignore the way his white under kimono now hung open much more than it usually did and instead averted her gaze to the cabinet in front of them. The air soon became more breathable, even though it wasn't by much as the cold water tried to absorb the steam, and she could almost hear Inuyasha sigh in relief. 

     "I'm sorry."

     Looking up, Kagome found Inuyasha with his gaze on the far wall. His shoulders were tense as if he expected conflict, and she noticed his nails digging into the rug on the floor. She smiled.

     "It's okay."

     Inuyasha's ears perked up and twitched in her direction before he turned his bewildered face to her. "What?"

     "I said it's okay." Kagome's smile turned a bit sad. "Inuyasha, it's still going to take time for me to heal. You really hurt me—more so than I have ever been before in my life." She placed her hand on his arm when he winced. "But I forgive you. I forgive you with all my heart. Please understand that." 

     He nodded in response, but she could still feel his taut muscles. 

     "Relax, Inuyasha." Kagome moved her hand to the back of his neck and began gently kneading the muscles. A small smile touched her lips when he closed his eyes and bent his head a bit to give her a better reach. "That's better." She was relieved when he sent a small smile her way.

     Suddenly, Inuyasha sat up on his knees to face her. Brushing some of the curling strands of hair from her face. "I really didn't mean it, Kagome."

     Breaths began coming shorter and her vision began clouding as his proximity came closer and closer, his face nearly upon hers. "Inuyasha, what are you doing?" 

     "I need you to know how sorry I am." He angled his head and brought his mouth lightly to hers, pushing against it gently with his own as her darks orbs snapped open wide with surprise. When she didn't kiss him back, he growled and brought his hand to the back of her neck to pull her closer.

     "This isn't like you, Inuyasha," Kagome murmured against his lips. "You're never like this." With saddened eyes, Kagome scooted back from him and hugged her knees to her chest. One of her hands came up to touch her mouth. "You kissed me."

     Another deep growl resonated in his chest. "But I was the only one who kissed."

     "It's not that easy, Inuyasha!" Kagome snapped, her eyes flashing. "You can't just kiss me—totally uncharacteristic of yourself, I might add—and expect everything to be all better! You hurt me, and right now having you kiss me only makes the pain more unbearable because it brings to surface other wounds that you have caused!" Tears began streaming down her face as they had before. She didn't want to be so harsh, but how could she have put it any other way? He just didn't understand.

     "Kissing you brings up other wounds?!" he asked incredulously, leaping up to put himself in front of her once again. "How could it if I've never kissed you before?!"

     Kagome held back tears and tapped him lightly on the mouth. "Do you remember where these lips have been?"

     Inuyasha immediately blushed a deep red. "That's not what this is about, Kagome, and you know it."

     "Oh, but it is! How can you kiss me after you have constantly gone and left me to kiss someone else? How do I know that you're not thinking about someone else while you kiss me? Do you know how much that would hurt?"

     "I wasn't kissing anyone but Kagome, Kagome!" 

     "Why am I supposed to believe that?"

     Inuyasha's amber eyes darkened as sadness filled them, and he dropped to the floor with a small thud. "You don't trust my word?"

     Kagome's eyes widened. "What?"

     "You don't trust me," he said flatly, edging away from here. "Then it's just like before."

     Now more confused than ever, Kagome moved toward him, inwardly flinching when he moved back until the counter pressed against his back and he couldn't move anymore. 

     "Inuyasha?"

     "You want to know why you are so different from Kikyou?" Those smoldering eyes that lifted to her were tired and bore right into her soul.

     Kagome swallowed, almost afraid to hear the answer.

     "You're different because you gave me your trust," he spoke quietly. "Or I thought that you had."

     "Inuyasha—"

     His eyes filled with anger and he leaned forward to get in her face. "Not having trust is what destroyed Kikyou's and my life, Kagome. I'm not going through that again." He stood up to leave.

     "Wait, Inuyasha!" Kagome jumped up and grabbed the sleeve of his white yukata. But when her eyes met his, she found that she couldn't say anything. Yes, she had been hurt by his words, but she had now also hurt him.

     "Have I ever lied to you, Kagome?"

     She shook her head.

     "Then why don't you believe me?"

     "I do," she admitted softy. "You never lie to me. I don't have a reason not to trust you." Moving forward, Kagome quickly slipped her arms around his waist from behind and reveled in his warmth. "I'm sorry." Tears of relief began slipped down her cheeks when she felt his clawed hands cover her locked ones, and she smiled when he pulled her around to embrace her fully. It wasn't often at all that he was open with her like this.

     "We're impossible," she said quietly. His quiet chuckle reached her ears.

     "Yeah."

     After a few moments Kagome pulled back, leaning against his arms for support, and for the first time in her life truly looked at him. He seemed so young with his boyish good looks, and yet his features held a strange kind of maturity in them. She found herself absently tracing a finger down an almost invisible line on his face caused by sleepless nights and stress. Long, thick hair the color of light silver, his perfect mouth…she saw it all. Not to mention his exotic eyes. But as Kagome traced the line down his face, she focused on those eyes and saw the stress of his everyday life. They were such an intense amber that even a casual glance burned through whoever the thoughtless look was cast to. She loved his eyes. When he fought to hide from the world what he felt, they were what told her everything he refused to speak aloud. But now there were dark circles, shouting out obnoxiously that he had not had sleep in days. Her fingers brushed lightly under them at the circles, and she smiled at the way he shuddered under her touch before dropping her hands to his shoulders. They were firm and strong just like the rest of his body. Slightly broad, she could tell that they were not done growing.

     "Kagome?"

     When he said her name, Kagome looked back up at his face, and she couldn't help but hug him again. In his face she saw the sorrow caused by a hard life; she saw a boy who had lost his father, a mother who meant more than anything to him, and a brother who had turned against him. She saw a life full of hardships and pain. But she also saw the brave man who lay underneath it all who would risk his life for those he cared for—the man who would risk his life for her. And by God, she loved him.

     "I should go to sleep," she whispered, breaking the physical contact.

     "Yeah." Inuyasha nodded and removed his arms from around her waist.

     Dropping her arms to her sides, Kagome chewed thoughtfully on her bottom lip before exiting the bathroom and motioning for Inuyasha to follow her.

     He moved forward to follow, but the sound of running water pounded in his ears. With a smirk, he quickly reached over and turned the knob to shut it off.

      Kagome stretched and grimaced when she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror. Steamy showers always felt good, but the hot vapors certainly had fun with her appearance when she was dry. She laughed quietly when Inuyasha caught sight of his own appearance behind her and frowned.

     "Oh, it's not that bad, Inuyasha."

     "Keh."

     "Don't do that," she chided softly, climbing under her sheets.

     With a sad smile, Inuyasha crossed the room to her window and stepped up on the ledge. His eyes rested on her form where she currently snuggled under her warm comforter and with a sigh, he stepped off the windowsill. 

     "Inuyasha?" Kagome asked when she heard his soft footfalls moving across her carpet.

     "I was kissing Kagome," he said softly. His hand lightly brushed her bangs back from her face before he leaned down and tenderly brushed his lips across hers. When he pulled back, he looked down at her surprised face and bit his bottom lip. A slow, steady blush rose in his cheeks, but he didn't try to conceal it as he looked away and allowed a slow smile to quirk his lips. "Goodnight, Kagome."

     Kagome stared, blinking after his unashamed display of affection as he leapt out the window and into the night. Her heart pounded against her ribcage as if he were still hovering over her, showing no signs of slowing anytime soon, and for the second time that night, her hand came up to her mouth. _He kissed me_. 

     Yes, the words he had so spitefully shouted at her before still hurt, but Kagome was beginning to find that even her wounded heart would heal much more quickly than she could have ever thought.

     Especially if he kissed her again.

A/N: Last one shot for a while. I had started it a while back and figured I should get it out before I totally forgot it. Hope that you all enjoyed this. God Bless, and let me know what you think! ~_Of Memories Past_

*Memories walks off and sees Inuyasha trying to sneak back in through Kagome's window* 

Memories: Inuyasha, no!

Kagome: *Glares at author* Why not?

Memories: *Glares back* 'Cause I said so!

Inuyasha: *To Memories* Out of my way, wench! 

Memories: _Author is immediately surrounded by the flames of her anger_. That's it Inuyasha. I've had enough of your attitude. I'm calling in the calvary. Oh, Sammy…

_Inuyasha blanches into a very unnatural color_.

Sammy: She won't stop me from torturing you this time!

J


End file.
